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THE WEDDING PLAN: Don’t Assume You Know What To Expect – Plan Well!
- February 24, 2020
By Mandeep Panesar
For many Sikh brides-to-be who are in the early stages of wedding planning, it can be easy to assume that you know what to expect. When your wedding day comes around the corner, reality can set in, and you can start to feel overwhelmed. I’ve been in that situation, and I’m here to help other future brides know what to expect on their wedding day, by sharing what my wedding day looked like.
This article will consist of two sections. The first section will be what a typical day looks like for a Sikh bride on their wedding day, hour-by-hour. The second section will be much shorter, and consist of some tips you’ll thank me later for :).
The timeline below is based off of the experience I had.
3:00 AM - Wake Up!
Waking up at 3:00 AM can be brutal. However, it proved to be useful in my experience because it helped me manage mishaps along the way. The process involved waking up, showering, and being ready for my makeup artist.
7:00-7:30 - Single Shots!
When I mean shots, I mean single photos of you just before you start the family photos. You want to make sure you capture these amazing moments. I chose not to skip the session because I knew I would be looking for your head shots when you are looking through your photos later on.
7:30-8:30 - Family Photos
This is the time to gather the whole family. Get as many photos as possible because you might not get the time later.
8:30-9:30 - Travel to Gurdwara
This is crunch time, you want to reach before the grooms side arrives.
10:00-10:30 - Milini & Ardaas
The Milni consists of a formal greeting ceremony between the bride and groom’s families minus the bride because she has to be in hiding till the wedding ceremony begins. The Milni is followed by Ardaas, which happens before everyone enters the Gurdwara. Personally speaking, this was my time to sneak in as fast as possible and get my last minute issues situated before I have to walk down the aisle.
10:30-11:00 - Breakfast & Tea
Have your morning appetizers and tea before the wedding begins. This is the time to mingle with guests as they arrive. Essentially, it is a social time to get yourself well prepared for the next 2 hours of sitting.
11:00-11:30 - Make Way to Darbar Hall
It is time for the groom & his parents to make their way to the darbar hall. This is when all the guests should be making their way to the darbar hall for seating before the bride makes her entrance.
At this point, I watched from a room as everyone was making their way in while I started low key panicking a little bit because we were late. We were told we were to be married before noon.
11:30-12:00 - Here Comes the Bride
The bride should make her way down the aisle to be a married woman to the man of her dreams! The ceremony begins and the couple are officially married. As mentioned earlier, the ceremony does last about 2 hours, but the actual wedding portion is typically just under an hour.
12:00-1:00 - Announcements & Performances
This portion could be skipped for some people weddings but for the most part there is always someone who gives a speech of advice for the newly weds.
We had multiple speeches and performances during this time that were organized by my in-laws.
1:00-1:30 - Shagun
The parents start by giving their blessings to the children at this time followed by the rest of the guests.
For me, the Shagun took place on a hot summer day in Edmonton, Alberta. There was no ac, my leg fell asleep, and I was feeling uncomfortable in my velvet outfit, while 800 guests graced us with their blessings. The Shagun was only about 30 minutes, but felt like ages!
1:30-2:00 - Lunch is Served
At this point, guests can make their way back to the langar hall to enjoy a lovely lunch to end this wedding ceremony.
For me personally, there wasn’t enough time to relax and enjoy our food, since my husband and I needed to join the bridal party & groomsmen were waiting to head out for the photo-shoot.
2:00-4:00 - Photos
Gather all your bridesmaids & groomsmen for your wedding photo-shoot and head on over to the photo shoot location.
4:00-4:30 - Head to Bride’s House
After finishing the bride and groomsmen photo-shoot, it’s time to travel back to the bride’s house to start the preparation for the dholi.
4:30-5:30 - Doli
At the bride’s house, the bride’s family welcomes groom’s side with tea and snacks before the doli process begins. After the doli, the bride departs to the grooms house.
6:00 - Paani Varna
The Paani Varna consists of welcoming the new bride to the groom’s house. The welcoming ceremony from the groom's mother & family. During this time there can be games set up for the newly wedded. The entrance was amazing and everyone was so overjoyed with love, it was a memorable moment followed by some games.
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Tips
Sleep early. Waking up at 3 AM is no joke - especially for what ends up being nearly a 24 hour day. I personally didn’t sleep until almost midnight the next day, and found myself cranky and hangry for much of the day.
A Good Makeup Artist is your best friend...kind of. Seriously though. A good makeup artist will do more than glam you up, and then leave. The morning of my ceremony, my makeup artist was dialed down, ready to go, and providing me with both makeup and mental support.
Try to stick to a schedule. For me, my individual photo shoot got cut short due to running behind schedule, and was rushing to the Gurdwara.
Taking group photos, in large groups. Try to do more group shots if possible to get the process moving faster for group photos. Doing so saves time and can keep your wedding day on track.
Have a dream team as your bridesmaids. You will be hungry, tired, and uncomfortable. Chances are that you will have little to no time to eat, rest, or think. My bridesmaids were the best & got me some snacks to make sure I didn’t have a grumbling stomach or to avoid me being a hangry bride-zilla.
Plan your bridal shoot ahead of time. Make sure you have a location selected beforehand because you wanna make sure you are not wasting any time because you have a full agenda ahead still. My husband had the location picked out beforehand & it was so amazing because we just went in & did our thing and left. No stress whatsoever during this time.
If you leave your family home to go to the groom’s home, emotionally prepare yourself. This was one of the hardest parts of that day, the dholi is full of so much emotion that I can’t even describe the feeling. I was a HOT MESS.
Hope Your Wedding Is Perfect. Enjoy Married life!